"Sorry, I don't know how to not softball."
1. Corn dogs from gas stations are often referred to as ‘dinner’.
You’re not too good for a corn dog that’s been sitting there for 4 hours. You’re just not.
2. When the Chinese lady handed me my takeout and said ‘have a nice day’ I responded with ‘good game’.
*Face palm* Sorry, I don’t know how to not softball.
3. Those tan lines, though.
We all know the classic “Racerback”. Then there is the ever-popular “Permanent Sunglasses”. Followed by my personal favorite “Glove Hand Tan”. And don’t forget those beautiful tan lines at your ankles. JK. That’s dirt.
4. “Will somebody braid my hair?”
I pity the fool who admits to knowing how to braid. Let me know if you need some Advil for that arthritis that you’re about to develop.
5. It’s bow time
I didn’t choose the bow life. The bow life chose me. I love breaking out the biggest, most glittery bows you’ve ever seen during softball season. I have no shame in the bow game.
6. I’m. So. Hungry.
I’ve been up since 6:00am and played five games today. There’s no measurable amount of food that can fix this, but we will try. We will try.
7. I may or may not develop a drug habit
Game today? Better take a couple ibuprofen. Ehh..let’s make it four just to be safe. Another game? I should probably take a couple more. We play again? A few more won’t hurt. #TeamLowInflammation.
8. Tournament Tees
Yasssss. I know what I’m wearing to school on Monday.
9. The apparent baseball/softball conundrum
At least once a season I nearly throat punch someone for telling me that baseball and softball are the same thing. No. No they aren't. They are fundamentally different games. I have never in my life played a game of baseball. Go home.
10. My leg is sticking to my pants…my bed…my chair…my life.
My strawberry is oozing gross leg juice and it’s sticking to everything. Don’t mind me while I peel my leg from whatever surface it’s currently adhered to. Just keepin’ it classy over here.
11. Let me set 293409283 alarms for in the morning
It's my biggest fear to oversleep and be late for a game or practice. So I set 20 bajillion alarms just to be safe. You can never be too careful.
12. Oh, dear God. I forgot my headphones.
Forget your headphones on a long trip? Might as well go ahead and quit life.
So, how do you know it's softball season? Share your personal experiences by commenting below!