I spend a good amount of my time organizing and running camps and clinics as well as giving private lessons. I’ve had a lot of athletes walk through my door. I’ve worked with 7 year olds and I’ve worked with 20 year olds. I’ve worked with beginners and I’ve worked with advanced athletes. And I tell them all the same thing:
 
YOU have to believe in YOU. You have to know that every time you step in that box, that you are an athlete. You are a competitor and you will win. That pitcher on the mound...she’s not better than you. You can beat her. You can win the battle. You have trained and practiced for this. You have done everything you can to be the best that you can. You know your strengths. You know your weaknesses. You are disciplined. You are focused. You are CONFIDENT. Believe in you. It doesn’t matter if I believe in you or if your coach believes in your or if your mom believes in you. What matters is that in your head and in your heart you know that you can succeed.
 
You are not arrogant. You are not prideful. You are not boastful. You are confident. Confidence is quiet. Arrogance is loud. Confidence will speak for itself. Let it. You are not in competition to get an All-Star award or to get your name in the newspaper. You are in competition to beat that pitcher on the mound. Because beating that pitcher gives your team a better chance to win. Every time you succeed, your teammates succeed. Every time your teammates succeed, you succeed. And every little success adds up throughout the game to create a win for your team.
 
Sometimes, you will fail. That’s okay. That’s part of the game. This game was not designed for you to be 100% successful. That’s never happened and it never will. But what kind of player will you choose to be after you fail – after that pitcher beats you? Will you let it break you mentally? Will you let it take away your confidence? Or will you be mentally tough because you know that next time, you CAN win. You won’t always be successful, but the point is that every time you step in the box, you have the OPPORTUNITY to be successful. And every time you step in the box you know that this time CAN be your time.
 
This game is 90% mental. The physical part is easy. A lot of people have the physical skills. Champions are distinguished through their mental game. Are you going to be mentally tough? Are you going to let a loss get to your confidence? Are you going to give up and shut down? Are you going to let next time be decided by last time? Or are you going to tell yourself, “No opponent is better than me. That pitcher on the mound isn’t better than me. I can win. And I will.”
 
You are not arrogant. You are confident.
 
“I told myself I was great before I ever knew that I was.” – Muhammad Ali

Continuing on in the spirit of team, I want to talk about what contributes to a truly great team. I previously wrote an article about how ‘It Takes Nine’ to play the game. That wasn’t entirely true. Yes, you only need nine to play a softball game, but on the vast majority of teams there are anywhere from 12 to 25 girls. Only nine (or ten) can play at a time and those who are aren’t in the lineup often feel disappointed, unimportant and like they can’t contribute to the success of the team. The idea that if you’re not playing then you’re not contributing is false. Every member of the team plays a pivotal role in team success and I want to remind the girls in the dugout of that. If you are in the dugout…you still have the opportunity to contribute to the success of your team. But will you?

Motivation & Encouragement
This is by far the most important thing the girls in the dugout can contribute. Flat out - an upbeat, positive, loud dugout makes a huge difference. I feel like I can’t stress that point enough. A lot of players don’t believe in that, but I’m telling you from many years of experience…it matters. It plays a role in how your team and the other team plays.

I’ve played on teams that had the loudest most supportive dugouts you can imagine. Other teams hated us. Not because we were mean or ugly in our cheering, but just because we were loud and supportive and that annoyed them. You’re mistaken if you don’t believe that a dugout full of girls screaming and yelling in support of their team won’t shake the confidence of their opponents. When your opponent sees 12 to 25 girls rallying, cheering, pumping up their team and being AS LOUD as they possibly can be, it tells the other team that you aren’t giving up. You’re going to fight. You’re going to continue to give 100% no matter what the score is. If you’re up by ten, down by ten, or the score is tied, a loud dugout can get in the head of your opponent. I’ve been a part of it and I’ve witnessed it. I coached the most awesome group of girls this past year down in Excel, Alabama. I had the sweetest girls who were also amazing athletes. And I had a dugout full of non-starters and JV players who absolutely helped us win games. Their excitement, passion, and support of the ten girls in the lineup still leaves me in awe and makes me so proud of them. (Shout out to my Lady Panthers! Excel, baby!!)

Aside from psyching out your opponents, a loud dugout motivates and pumps up your own players. It’s really hard not to get excited when everyone around you is up on their feet cheering, stomping, clapping, and yelling. You have the opportunity to inspire and motivate the girls playing. It shows that you believe in them. It shows you support them. It shows you love them. So get up off the bench, get on the fence, and give everything you can to your team.

Relief
If you are in the dugout you are the relief for the girls in the lineup. It’s reassuring to those girls to know if something were to happen and they had to come out of the game, there is someone else in the dugout who is ready to fill their shoes. So, pay attention. Know what is going on. Support the team. And be ready to fight for the team. If you are in the dugout, you are constantly in relief. Be prepared for when the opportunity comes. Know where your equipment is so you can go in at a moment’s notice. Stay loose. Be into the game. Cheer. As a coach, I’m much more likely to put in the person who has been up on the fence watching and cheering on her team rather than someone who has been sitting on the bench not paying attention.

Watch and Learn
When you are in the dugout you have the opportunity to watch and learn from the starters. You get to learn from their mistakes without the personal repercussions. This is another reason why, as a coach, I carried my JV team with me everywhere. They were there to support, cheer, and learn so when it was their time to step up on to the varsity field, they were ready and knew what was expected of them. Take advantage of the dugout. Use it to your benefit. One day it will be your turn. Make sure you’re ready. 

*

I have said before that being on a team requires selflessness. It’s not always easy. It’s not always fun. Everyone wants to be in the game. Unfortunately, that’s not a reality. Only ten can play at a time. But just because you’re not one of the ten, doesn’t mean you can’t play a role in team success. So, you have a choice. You can sit on the bench and pout because you’re not playing or you can get up, set your ego aside, and contribute. It’s your decision.  Who will you decide to be?

In the spirit of my series of posts on ‘TEAM’ I have compiled a list of things that good teammates do or don’t do. Some of it is light- hearted. Some of it is pretty serious. Either way, thou shall follow the handbook if you want to be a good teammate.

Don’t be late. Ever. For any reason.
Because the rest of us are going to run for it and now we all hate you.


Get a good night’s sleep the night before games
Don’t be selfish. Your team is counting on you to be 100% and you can’t do that if you’re running on 2 hours of       sleep.

Take care of yourself
Again, your team is counting on you. Your body can’t perform its best if you aren’t getting enough sleep, drinking enough water, and eating right. Don’t skip meals either. Especially on game days.

Don’t drink 24 hours before a game
If you are under aged this rule shouldn’t apply to you. But if you are 21 and over you have the right to drink. I can’t stop you. But don’t drink the night before a game. That’s completely unacceptable and selfish.

Make sure the smell of your cleats don’t gag your teammates
Come on, man. Get some Febreeze.

Don’t gossip to your teammates about your other teammates
Don’t create or encourage drama. This creates bad vibes and tension within the team. Learn to keep your mouth shut and your life will be much easier and happier. I promise. 

Touch the freakin’ line!
If the coach tells you to run to a certain point…you run to that point. If we run extra because you weren’t willing to go 2 inches further, I can assure you, we all hate you.

Don’t be the person who forgets their ponytail holder every single day
That person is really annoying.

Wear a sports bra
For everyone’s sake.

Don’t be the person who always has an excuse
As a coach, I hate it. And as a player, I’m completely annoyed when people constantly make excuses. Hold yourself accountable and do better next time.

Wear sliders
No one should see ‘PINK’ written across your butt through your white pants.

Don’t be a Bat Nazi
Yes, I understand that’s your personal bat but sharing is caring, yo. It’s softball etiquette. If someone asks to swing your bat, you let them. Plus, if you don’t, all your teammates secretly think you’re kind of a jerk.

Don’t bang your cleats with someone else’s bat
If someone lets you borrow their bat, DO NOT hit your metal cleats (or anything else) with their bat. Now you’re the jerk.

Don’t make a big deal if you get called out
It’s embarrassing. If you get called on the third strike or you get called out sliding into a bag, don’t throw a fit. A) The umpire isn’t going to change their call & B) It’s tacky.

Don’t take the option
If coach gives you an option to do something, do it anyway. Everything about ball isn’t a blast. You have to fundraise, pull tarp, clean the locker room, pick up trash on the bus, and all other sorts of not so fun stuff. You’re part of a team and EVERYONE on the team needs to pull their weight.

Carry equipment
Unless your coach has designated certain equipment to certain players, everyone should help out. Don’t leave it to the same soft-spoken, timid kids every time. Get down off your horse and set an example. Do your part.

Keep up with your school work
You don’t help your team out in any way if you are ineligible to play.

Don’t blast your music on the bus
I shouldn’t be able to hear your music if I’m sitting right next to you much less five rows back. Some people are trying to do homework. Some people are trying to sleep. Some people just don’t want to hear your stinkin’ music. Be considerate. Be respectful.

If it’s not important…don’t tell the coach
Your coach doesn’t need to know every little piece of drama. If it’s big and it has the potential to affect the team or it can’t be handled without the coach’s help…yes, involve them. Otherwise, just be quiet.

Don’t bash your coach to your teammates
I know it can be hard at times. (Trust me. I know.) Coach benched you. Coach yelled at you. Coach is unfair. But when you start bashing your coach the next thing you know other people are joining in and suddenly you have the entire team rioting in protest against the person who runs your team and makes it possible for you to even play. (I can assure you, you’re not going to get your coach fired. Sorry ‘bout it.) Flat out, talking smack is contagious. Don’t poison the entire team because you’re upset in the moment. Suck it up and move on.

What happens at softball stays at softball
Don’t tell outsiders all the embarrassing details you learn about your teammates. Keep it in the team.

Don’t be a diva
Ugh. Just don’t.

Don’t take yourself too seriously
If you take a tumble at practice, be willing to laugh it off along with everyone else. Don’t be a Debbie D just because you have two left feet.

Follow your teams rituals
Even if you think it doesn’t matter if the bats are crossed or if you step on the line, just go along with your team’s rituals. It’s not going to kill you.

Don’t be the jerk of an upperclassman
Don’t constantly call on the freshman or rookies to do your dirty work. They are your teammates. Not servants. I promise you, you are fully capable of carrying equipment or manning the bucket during BP.

Learn to throw front toss
This isn’t even a skill. Like, anyone could do this. My grandmother could do this. (Hey, Nana!) It’s really annoying when you’re incapable of underhand tossing a ball to a target from 15 feet away.

Don’t give me a high five after I strike out
I’m really angry right now. I know you’re trying to be encouraging and uplifting, but please, just give me space. I need a second to stop contemplating suicide. Feel free to throw me a “You’ll get it next time” from across the dugout. (I probably take softball more seriously than I should. I’m aware of that.)

Celebrate the success of your teammates
Don’t be a Jelly Janice. Someone on your team did something awesome, which translates into a positive thing for the team. Spit out that Haterade and say congrats (and actually mean it).

Don’t hype up the pitcher unless it’s true
Just because you struck out, don’t come in the dugout and tell everyone she has the sickest rise ball you’ve ever seen (back to the ‘don’t make excuses’ point). Uhh, no. It didn’t move. You just missed. And now you just psyched out your own teammates before they ever stepped up to the plate.

Play because you love the game
If you aren’t playing ball because you love it, do yourself and your teammates a favor and walk away. You can’t fully commit and invest in something if you don’t love it. Your teammates are counting on you to give your all to the team and you can’t do that if your heart isn’t in it.


Being a good teammate isn't always easy or necessarily 'fun'. It requires sacrifice and selflessness. I have probably broken every single one of these rules at some point in my softball career. I am not softball sinless and I don't claim to be. But as the saying goes, "You live and you learn." And then you write a blog. 

I recently came across an article by Amanda Scarborough (see here) that got me thinking. Her article talks about why so many people are in awe of pitchers. Yes, pitchers work hard and they do impressive work. I have a great deal of respect and admiration for anyone who dedicates themselves to being a Grade A pitcher. But as a catcher, I understand what it’s like to be on the receiving end of that pitch. So, I want to talk about why I believe catchers are undervalued. Yes, I do understand that there are a lot of people who love the work catchers do and appreciate them exponentially, but for the most part, I feel as though the general population does not understand what goes into being a good catcher and I hope to change that.

Time
For every pitching session a college pitcher attends so does a catcher. In fact, catchers attend more. Most teams will have two or three catchers but far more pitchers. Here is an example of what a day looked like for me as a college catcher:

6:00 – 7:00      Team conditioning and lifting
8:00 – 9:00      Catch for Pitcher #1
9:00 – 10:00    Catch for Pitcher #2
10:30 – 1:00      Class
2:00 – 3:00      Catch for Pitcher #3
3:00 – 3:30      Catcher practice
3:30 – 5:30      Team practice
6:00 – 6:30      Dinner
7:00 – 8:00      I’d usually try to get in some extra cardio

Then I’d do any homework I had, try to hang out with my friends for a bit, and then collapse into bed and slip into a coma around midnight. So that puts regular fielders dedicating 3 hours per day to softball, pitchers 4 hours, and me (the catcher) dedicating 6 ½ hours to softball each day.

Not every single day was quite this packed, but the vast majority of them were. Catchers dedicate more time to the game than anyone. Think of the catcher as the quarterback of the team. They have to work for and adapt to each pitcher, learning their signals, their preferred series, their temperament, and how to properly catch each of their pitches. They have to spend time studying and analyzing opposing teams and hitters. The catcher has to understand the game better than anyone as she is the one giving the commands. The catcher controls herself, the pitcher, and the rest of the field. All of those things take practice, work, and time.

Work
You can see from the above section that catchers put a lot of time into their work. But what people don’t know is that catching is a craft. Framing a pitch looks simple, but have you ever tried drop your elbow the ground while avoiding your knee in order to frame a tight, low screwball coming in at 68mph from 43ft (that’s a 96mph baseball pitch) without flipping your glove over all while trying to make the umpire think you never moved a muscle? Have you ever tried to simultaneously ‘go get the pitch’ while also having ‘soft hands’? Have you ever tried to neatly and discretely frame a pitch that was supposed to be screwball but ending up going outside? Well, I can tell you this…it’s not easy. And it’s not something just anyone can do. Framing is an art. It’s subtle and completely unobvious to the untrained eye. You won’t even be able to tell if a good catcher has framed the pitch or if it was actually in the zone. Not just anyone can do that.

Aside from framing catchers have to block. We spend countless hours throwing all of our body weight onto our knees over and over and over again. Just 15 minutes of blocking practice will leave a catcher’s knees completely black and blue and swollen. And after our knees are hurting and we think they are going to fall off, we’ll go to the bullpen and do 200 squats to catch up another pitcher.

Work. Catchers. Put. In. Work.

Leadership
Catchers are the commanders of the field. They are responsible for what every single player does on that field. People always say that pitchers are the center of the field and they are the center of attention. That’s false. Everyone isn’t looking at the pitcher. Everyone, including the pitcher, is looking at the catcher. It doesn't matter what the ball is doing when it leaves the pitcher's hand. It matters what it's doing when it's crossing that plate and that's catcher territory. The catcher is the team leader. They are the voice of the team. Any truly great catcher will also be a great leader. The catcher has to know and understand the game inside and out. They have to know the situation, the count, how many outs there are, the speed of the runners, what the hitter did last time, what number the hitter is in the lineup, what the hitter's strengths and weaknesses are, what kind of day the pitcher is having, and where she’s going to command the ball if it’s put into play. She has to know and be able to do all of that while also being the morale of the team. The catcher is the one who is responsible for picking the team up and encouraging them. She has to keep her pitcher calm and positive. The catcher has to put on a good face even if she just struck out or missed the block, because everyone is looking at her. The catcher is responsible for motivating and inspiring her team even when things aren’t going well. A good catcher is a leader even when it’s tough to be because she knows she doesn't have a choice. When you decide to suit up you decide to be a leader.

Pressure
There is a tremendous amount of pressure on pitchers. I 100% agree with that. I can’t even imagine how a pitcher must feel standing in that circle. I couldn’t do what pitchers do. But there is also a huge amount of pressure on catchers as well.

What ever happened to the ‘wild pitch’? A ‘wild pitch’ occurs when the pitcher throws a pitch where it shouldn’t be. For example, if she throws it over the catchers head or if she throws a curve ball in the right handed batter’s it’s supposed to be a ‘wild pitch’ which essentially means it was the pitcher’s fault and that the catcher was physically unable to catch the ball. A ‘pass ball’ occurs when a ball gets by the catcher that she should have stopped. For example, a drop ball goes in the dirt and gets past the catcher, that’s the catcher’s fault. But whatever happened to the wild pitch? I haven’t seen a wild pitch documented in ages. Every pitch that gets by, including the one I leapt into the air for from a squatted position and still wasn't able to get a glove on it because it was so far over my head, is being documented as a ‘pass ball’. We blame catchers for pitchers mistakes. That puts a ton of pressure on a catcher. All I’m saying is, we don’t call it an error on the left fielder because she wasn’t able to jump up 10ft in the air and rob the homerun. Let’s not do it to catchers either.

There is also so much pressure put on catchers by coaches when it comes to pitch calling. Technically, the pitcher calls the game. The catcher just gives suggestions and if the pitcher doesn’t like that suggestion, she shakes off her catcher and gets a new suggestion. But when things go south, it’s always the catcher who is getting ripped a new one. It’s always “Why did YOU call that pitch?” It’s the catcher who must silently take the blame. When the pitcher misses a spot and gets a ball jacked, the coach wants to know what the catcher called, because it must be her fault. That’s extremely stressful to deal with as a catcher and it results in catchers not being confident and second guessing themselves. The point of this IS NOT to say ‘Let’s blame the pitcher.' Let’s not blame anyone. Because coaches, I guarantee your catcher did not purposefully call a pitch that would result in a homerun and your pitcher didn’t purposefully miss her spot. Everyone is doing the best they can. So let’s stop the accusing and blaming mid-game and calmly talk about better pitch selections and hitting our spots after because it doesn’t do the team any good to create a shaky, scared catcher.

Catchers are hitters too
At the college level and after, it’s extremely rare to have a pitcher who also hits in the lineup. I’m not saying it doesn’t happen, but it’s rare. Most pitchers focus strictly on their pitching. In fact, in college, most of our pitchers didn’t even touch a bat in practice either. While everyone else was hitting they would be sent to jog some poles or do some abs. Catchers on the other hand also have to be hitters. If you are a catcher who is a weak hitter, you’re going to have a hard time getting picked up. Catchers are typically expected to not just be hitters, but to be good hitters. With catchers being strong in stature, we expect them to be a top hitter for the team. If you are good defensively but weak offensively, chances are they will put another catcher in your spot. Catchers have to master every aspect of the game.

*

Being a catcher isn’t for everyone. It takes dedication, leadership, and heart.  A quality catcher has to be an expert at every facet of the game, including pitching because they will be expected to be able to tell pitchers what they are doing wrong if a pitch isn’t working properly. (Yeah, we have to watch their body as they pitch while simultaneously catching the ball. It’s crazy. We’re basically ninjas.) We work hard  and sacrifice ourselves for the glory of the team. We tangle our bodies into the most uncomfortable positions to get another strike called. We knowingly bruise our knees and willingly take a dirt ball to our bare shoulder. We study and stress over the game so that our teammates can rest easy. We carry the burden of the ‘pass ball’ and heed the coach's wrath so that our pitcher doesn’t have to.  

A catcher doesn’t catch in order to gain glory or recognition. A catcher catches because they love the game and are willing to suit up and take on the hottest spot on the field because they know their team needs someone they can trust back there. So the next time you see a quality catcher, pat them on the back and tell them you appreciate what they do because they squatted their butt ON to get where they are. Here's looking at you, catchers. Literally.

Ever since I read Caitlin Lowe's retirement letter (see here) I can't get those words out of my head. Nothing has resonated with me more. It's beautifully written and so true. "...it will pay you back in ways you could have never even imagined." The game gives much more than it takes. When you commit to it, and you do it with pride and passion,  the game will re-pay you. This led me to think about everything the game has done for me. Too often we focus only on what we sacrifice and never fully see or appreciate all of the benefits we get in return. Today I celebrate what the game has given me. 

A Strong Work Ethic
A work ethic is something that never goes out of style and will be required to do any job in this world. The game taught me how to work hard. It taught me to take pride in my work and my effort. I never wanted to be the player who got by on raw talent. Ever heard the saying "Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard"? Well it's true. As a coach, I'd much rather have average talent players with high work ethics than high talent players with low work ethics. My high school coach taught me everything I'd ever need to know about what hard work looks and feels like. It looks like five more push ups because we didn't protect the ball. It looks like another round of defense because repetition builds skill. It looks like a five hour practice on a Saturday because we'll do whatever it takes to be better than the competition. It looks like one more sprint just because we can. We don't quit because we are tired. We quit because we are finished. Take pride in what you're capable of giving to your team. Anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift.  

A Sense of Responsibility
Lack of responsibility is something, that, in my opinion, is unacceptable. YOU are responsible for YOU. Your mom isn't responsible for packing your bag - YOU are. Your roommate isn't responsible for waking you up - YOU are. The umpire is not responsible for your strike out - YOU are. The game taught me that no body cares about my excuses. I was late? Well guess what? Now the entire team gets to run for it. The game taught me that I am responsible for doing everything I can do to look out for the team. Your teammates are counting on you to show up and be present. They are counting on you to work hard and improve. They are counting on you to give your best day in and day out. When you decide to play a team sport, understand that you also signed up to do whatever it takes to take care of and protect the team. 

Tough Skin
I had coaches who yelled at me on the field in the middle of the game. I had coaches who benched me. I had coaches who punished me. I had coaches who were hard on me. I survived and am better for it. Parents, you do your child an injustice when you don't let a coach be hard on them. I can assure you, as an adult who has been a coach, no one is out for your kid. They are KIDS. I don't plot against children. I try to make them the best they can be. When I coached this past year, I had parents rip me up one way and down the other for the way I ran my team. Everyone isn't going to agree with you. Everyone isn't going to like the way you do things. That's okay. You'll have people your entire life critiquing your work. Toughen up, learn how to deal, and move on.

How to Succeed & How to Fail
I've experienced a lot of success in this game and I've also experienced a lot of failure. The game has taught me how to win and lose with class. It taught me how to pick myself up, dust myself off, and try again. Life will knock you down time and time again. That's okay as long as you don't stay down.  Win or lose, rain or shine, hold your head high, carry yourself with dignity, and take care of business. 

Independence
The game taught me to be independent. It taught me how to take care of myself away from my parents. Moving to another state to play ball at 18 made me grow up and learn how to be an adult. I had to learn how to balance school work, softball, friends, and personal time. I had to learn how to budget money. I had to learn how to navigate in a completely foreign place.  I encourage girls to go to college away from home after high school. Start over in a new city where you don't know anyone and where there's no one to take care of you but yourself.  Now, I can move to a new city or new country where I don't know anyone at the drop of a hat. That sense of independence has opened doors for me and provided me with opportunities that less independent people would be too scared to take. 

Networking and Friends
My social network is vast and it's all because of the game. I know people all over the place! I have so many connections and have made so many friends through my experiences with softball. Every single one of my close friends I have played softball with. I've had the opportunity to meet so many new and interesting people over the years through travel ball, college ball, coaching, instructing, and post-college ball. There's a lot to learn from the different people you meet through the game. 

Career
You may think softball is just a game, but for me, it is my career. And how great is it to play a game your entire life and get paid for it?! My love for the game led me to coaching and will lead me back again when I can no longer play. But what my parents thought would just be a hobby when they signed me up at age five turned into the greatest gift they ever gave me. They shaped my entire future with the decision. The game has given me a life long passion and the opportunity to pursue it. 

Travel
Travel is huge right now. Have you been on Pinterest lately? The game has taken me to so many places that I otherwise wouldn't have seen. I've played in the US, Canada, and very soon, Austria. I have lived in three states and two other countries because of the game. I have been to countless cities and played on countless diamonds over the years. I started playing travel ball when I was 8 and never looked backed. I'm so excited to see where else the game takes me. Check out the map below to see all of the places softball has taken me in North America. 

The list could go on and on. The game has given me countless attributes, experiences, and qualities. It has shaped me into the person I am and has allowed me to chase a dream. It's given me so much and can do the same for you. "If you respect the game, in all it's glory, if you do it with passion..."